Tigre Reporting at Christmas

Spotty joins the horses out in the first pasture.

It’s good to be home. I was even glad to see the leafcutter ants – as they busily dismantled and carted off the Ylang Ylang tree. Rascals!
Gerry lasted less than a week before returning to New Orleans… Ostensibly to return our Chesterfield sofa back to the manufacturer for repair. Yes, yes, that’s true. What’s also very true is that GRAK was only too relieved to get back again to New Orleans…N’awlins….The Big Easy… good music, good food, good booze and good friends…even if just for one week.
Respite from…the dust…construction…workers everywhere…welding, sanding, painting….
….over to Janet’s kitchen for breakfast….to the kids, cats, dogs ….each wanting attention and affection all along the way, to finally, the kitchen table and breakfast- coffee and fruit- all fresh and delicious from El Tigre orchards…
…but wait! Where was Victoria?
Down here in the forest with Flopsy. Sadly, we lost Samantha to snakebite this past September. A Terciopelo bit her in the neck. Sammy went sniffing where she shouldn’t have and…we couldn’t save her. All the rest of the pack is fine – their instinct to please is stronger than their instinct to hunt, which better assures their survival in the forest. When I yell ….Come! Heal! Sit! Stay! They (mostly) obey.
Sammy was a poodle/Pekinese mix some call a pekapoo – a sweet little thing with a killer instinct. She would ignore my hollering to ‘COME!’ and continue pursuing prey, no matter how mad I would get at her. The vet told us that even if she had survived the snakebite, she would have just gone right back out there and hunted again.
Is your dog a natural born killer? How does he respond when you ask him not to chase a squirrel?
In our experience, the best dog for forest living is the mixed breed – Zaguates they call them in Costa Rica – like my little dog, Flopsy. We got Flops from some Animal Rescue friends who rescued him from a very bad man who tortured his dogs to death. The neighbors complained about the yelping and our friends went in there with the police and got the dogs. I’ll write about the Animal Rescue girlfriends another time. Suffice it to say they are drop-dead gorgeous women with whom the normally ahorita police are only too happy to drop everything in order to escort them to the crime scene. Flops came to us with broken teeth and ribs.
He’s fine now and walks with me everywhere. He doesn’t hunt or chase prey while hiking, so he won’t get into any trouble. We will get old together, Flopsy and me, walking companionably together down in the forest…
…and stopping often. Listening to the whoooooosh of Aracaris flying above us, feeding on the massive Higueron trees; warblers flitting everywhere; monkeys up there too, the males moving closer, throwing a branch down at us now and then, but half-heartedly, not like before when Sammy would go ape-shit barking at them. We are just getting used to each other, aware that we are harmless to each other. Little by little, when I stay very still, the animal presence makes itself seen and heard. Flopsy sits quietly at my side.
At last count, El Tigre has a pack of 9 dogs and 10 cats. Skinny Bones, a scrawny cat, showed up while we were in New Orleans and was accepted into our pack. Why so many cats and dogs? Well we prefer them in the garden to venomous snakes, who hunt the same small prey. While we’ve had casualties – Lucky and Luna to Bufo toads, Maggie and Pipsy to the forest - more abandoned animals find their way to us, quickly replacing those lost.
When you go to the forest, please do not abandon your dog or cat there. I’m sure YOU wouldn’t, but so many other people abandon their animals out in the country. The poor animals usually die a cruel death. If you see a dog or cat meandering aimlessly or sitting along the road, pick it up and take it home. It has just been abandoned. The lucky ones get adopted by the locals. But usually, the other resident dogs drive them away to fates unknown. That’s the way it works in the country.
If you can’t place an abandoned dog yourself, as a last resort take it to the shelter. Once, we took a rescued dog named Piglet to the animal shelter in Heredia and he was adopted that same day by a nice couple wanting a small dog as companion to their Labrador. We gave the shelter manager, Lilian, a nice donation for helping to bring animals and people together; a much happier scenario than leaving him in the forest, where many perils await the domestic animal. Just as one example, we saw a huge Boa Constrictor the other day that could easily eat Flopsy for breakfast. The tropical forest is a scary place – our animals stay clear of it unless walking with us. You won’t see dogs wandering around by themselves in the tropical forest.
But for us visiting humans, the forest world is a source of wonder.
There is much to observe and study….measure K-species growth, identify flowering vines, experiment with plants – like the one in the ASTERAC family that the local indigenous Shaman says will produce an energy boost….hmmmm…coffee tastes better and its caffeine works better. Forget about it! I’ve had my fill of masking nasty tasting drugs during all those years in the pharmacy. Mostly, I’m taking my time, just enjoying the forest - waking up to it. There is so much living to do there…
….The phone’s ringing. It’s Gerald. I’m late for breakfast again.
Gerald is grumpy - very grumpy. He’s just estimated that the renovation work will require 3 more months, despite assurances to the contrary by the Professor-Architect. And this revelation has greatly annoyed him. Granted, the road washed out a couple of times during the rainy season, making travel all but impossible. But let’s get the job done already! Get going man! In your dreams! Our construction crew plods along slow but sure. They do good work -NO roof leaks after the worst rainy season in 30 years – but sooooo slooooooow!
On the bright side, the Solar system is working much better, now that Carlos has installed the new batteries (DEKA Unigy II). During this whole episode, we’ve learned more about electricity than we ever wanted to know, but that’s the consequence of becoming independent of the electrical company. You need to study a lot and/or find a good Solar Engineer. We use Carlos Oreamuno from www.consenergy.net
Why solar power? Because there is no electrical line on the road and we don’t want one. Our Swiss neighbors feel the same way. The best neighbors are the ones you can’t see. They’ve also gone solar. The other night, Gerry asked me why we used so much voltage. “Don’t have the foggiest idea”, I answered, while breaking up ice-cubes for his gin & tonic. Our Swiss neighbors will laugh at that one!
Apart from the usual employee bickering, the household and stables are running smoothly now, with several projects in the works. Gerry is particularly interested in renovating the horse stables and has undertaken an exhaustive investigation on the treatment of wood. His partner in this endeavor is none other than Dr. Bob from the Tex Mex, Santa Ana, who knows a lot about wood. He ought to – Tex Mex is lodged in an old structure entirely built with almond wood. Dr. Bob has seen it all – termites, ants, mold, you name it. He and Gerry regularly meet to discuss the wood issue and everything else over a Margarita or three.
We’re spending Christmas and Boxing Day with the 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse up on Barva Mountain, along with their respective families, entourages and menageries- a real collection of characters. It has been a hellish year for all, especially Pestilence. Famine – Pestilence – War – Death - they love each other like brothers and will spend the week hanging out together over copious amounts of refreshment and the odd bottle of vintage port, etc. The rest of us will put up with them as best we can…
Merry Christmas to you.
Happy Chanukah.
Pax Vobiscum.

I want to go home now!

Matchi at home grazing in Los Alvarados pasture. It's time to go home. Yes, New Orleans is also home - especially to the old sod. But El Tigre is really home. Home, home to perfect spring-like weather, rainy or dry, it's always the same, 70 - 85 Farenheit. Home to the forest. Home to our dogs - I can see them now, racing over to the car as we arrive, barking and jumping all around and plunging right inside as soon as I open the door; Spotty landing on my lap, licking my face and then jumping over to Gerald. Gerald sputtering but smiling. Now Flopsy's inside. The others wait outside but surround us when we finally emerge, small dog under each arm. Now the big dogs have their chance to greet us, leaving dusty paws all over our clothes.

Janet and the kids will come out and help us with luggage. We go inside to her kitchen and find the cats, all meowing and wanting to get petted. I walk over to the stables where the horses have already settled down in their stalls for the night. They knicker when they see me. Did I bring them a banana to eat? The barn cats are out and about, meandering with any stray chickens who managed to ignore the evening call to the hen house. Some of them prefer to face the predators than to sleep inside at night. They mostly survive, thanks to the stable cats and dogs. I hang out at the stable for a while, talking to Jose. How are the pastures? Fencerow repairs? Gardens doing okay? Nice way to spend many hours. But all too soon, I hear Gerald yelling at me to come back to unpack.

Then the walk to the house. Will it be done? Of course not. I know for a fact that they haven't even started the kitchen or any of the closets. Will at least one bedroom be ready for us to sleep in? Most likely yes - Janet will have seen to that. But will the bedroom actually be 'done' as in renovated? Quien sabe! The endless renovation is not something I see in mind's eye here in New Orleans. It's better that way.

Back to reality here in New Orleans. It's cold here. I'm sleeping in late - yes, I've been thoroughly GRAK'ed! I do get in Taiji practice but not much else. We do feast like kings. Regularly. Visit delightful new friends and spends hours wandering the old city. The street car returned to St. Charles a few weeks ago which connected us back to friends uptown. At this point, the city very much looks the same as it did before the storm. The conventioneers have returned, filling up the Vieux Carre with merry makers. Music is everywhere. Life is good in the Big Easy.

Some people wonder why we moved to the United States. Gerry's from London and has made his opinion of the States quite clear over the years. But we don't live in America - we live in New Orleans! There is no town quite like it anywhere in the world. That's why Katrina evacuees still pine to go home, even after finding jobs and settling their families in places all over the country.

That's how I can tolerate being away from El Tigre so long. Not sure if I could handle it anywhere else. Time for dinner. We're going to Emeril's new casual place called NOLA.

Local Haunts

In Costa Rica, I like to walk into the forest every morning to commune with the spirit world. I can’t do that in New Orleans. I try to stay centered here but it's not easy. Quite frankly, I’m heartbroken to be away from the forest and would much rather leave the man-made world behind and return once again to where I belong.

Luckily, there is much in New Orleans to distract one from heartache, despite the irony of Katrina having caused so much. We are entering into Halloween season and that has added much to Big Easy madness. Huge crowds arrived this week for Voodoo Fest and other seasonal celebrations so it’s quite normal to see vampires, voodoo queens and assorted other monsters wandering around the Quarter with ‘Huge Ass Beer’ in hand. And Halloween is still a week away! Some of our local Quarter friends invited us to a ‘progressive’ dinner next Friday as a form of recovery from the spooky spectacles. The Quarter-Rat idea of recovery is a long sprawling dinner that starts at somebody’s house on one end of Royal Street and wining, dining and dancing our way to the last house on the other side. However, everyone will be dressed in normal cocktail attire.

Gerry took me to a paranormal investigation this past Wednesday at the Pharmacy Museum. We joined some locals who have come across ‘entities’ throughout New Orleans, especially in the French Quarter, and they now wanted a shot at experiencing one of the infamous pharmacy ghosts. The best prospect would be that 18th century doctor who lived in the house and died raving mad of syphilis and mercury intoxication – self administered as a remedy. But we also could run into that crazy old chicken-bone chewing laundry woman from the 19th century or maybe that slightly disheveled Victorian lady addicted to morphine. There were so many ghosts to investigate just in the Pharmacy Museum. But our hosts told us that if we really wanted a good scare, we ought to check out the old Haunted Mortuary on Canal street or the Petit Theatre on Rue Chartres – where a bunch of kids still run around up in the attic, or go check out a slew of haunted houses all around town.

Turns out, we live in the most haunted city in the country. There were 3 psychics leading us on the investigation at this particular haunted establishment. The head parapsychologist was an affable chap who has been ghost-busting for 20 plus years. He’s been featured in documentaries like “New Orleans Rich and Haunted” on channels like A&E and Discovery. We have not personally met any ghosts in New Orleans, or psychics for that matter, but most of the others at the Pharmacy event knew the psychics, as well as all the local haunts around New Orleans.

So the psychics set the scene by briefing us on this or that entity around town, and as they describe their wacky, unnatural experiences, my mind wanders. I begin wondering how I can raid the laudanum jug and blame it on the pharmacy ghost. Then the parapsychologist assigns Gerry and me the task of using a magnetic device to measure any activity, while some of us follow a kind of goofy female psychic named Daena upstairs and all around the premises in search of something or other. Not much happens for a while. Daena tries to get people to feel the energy standing next to her up in the attic but the only magnetic activity Gerry and I could pickup was an electric wire in the wall.

Finally, we walk back down to the 2nd floor and - I'm not kidding - I suddenly get this strong feeling coming from one of the bedrooms on the 2nd floor. And you know me - incurable loud mouth - I tell Daena that I had this feeling of energy and so now Daena gets quite excited and leads us all into the bedroom - about 15 of us crowding in there, and I swear to God, I was feeling this Energy! It wasn't anything scary or foreboding – more like the kind of energy I get in the forest. So I look at Daena and say to her:

"I feel something - do you feel something too?"

And she looked deeply at me for a minute and all of a sudden started crying out to Gerry:

“Go get Cari! Please go get Cari….Cari!!! ….Cari!!!!"

Cari Joy is a New Orleans psychic who was at that moment leading half of our group elsewhere in the building. So Gerry runs off to look for Cari, and Daena just seems to have a meltdown right in front of me - and everyone else (none of whom felt anything at all).

Cari arrives, orders Daena out of the room and tries to focus the energy. But there was nothing. By this time, I had slid to the back of the room and behaved like nothing had happened at all, much less prompting a scene from our psychic. We all go back downstairs, but Daena stays up there and finally – it’s now 10:30PM - Gerry and I got out of there.

Moral of the story: If you feel energy around a psychic, keep your mouth shut!

But I did wonder what happened to poor Daena and felt kind of responsible - with my stupid “I feel it …do you feel it” line - so I emailed Cari and asked her if Daena was okay. Here’s her response:


Greetings Victoria,
Thank you for contacting me with your concern. I felt the energy in the bedroom when I brought my group in, as well. I felt that it was connected to loss during childbirth or shortly there after. So no, I did not feel it was negative just sad and heavy. Great job in using your own sensitivity!

Daena is what is considered a natural empath/medium. She is unable to stop entities from using her as a channel. She has learned to alert others when this is about to occur as it can be quite unnerving. Under different circumstances, I might have assisted in facilitating the experience but my instinct then was to pull her out of the area thus breaking the connection.

When I was younger, I was much like Daena but didn’t like to lose myself to spirit. I was fortunate to have excellent resources to learn how to turn it off as necessary, maintaining consciousness while gathering information. However, some choose to continue to use somnambulant communication.

I hope that I was able to answer your question. If you would like to explore the paranormal further, I suggest visiting the Haunted Mortuary. Thank you both for attending and perhaps I will see you in future!

So there it is! Quite frankly, I much prefer communing with the spirit world in the forest.

Retired in the Crescent City

Gerald loves this well known adage:

“Work is the curse of the drinking class”.
It’s not that he disliked work – he rather enjoyed it, especially when he could do things his way. That wasn’t always easy in the corporate world, where it’s either ‘our way or the highway’. But then there was GRAK’s way, and he managed to keep to his principles throughout all those years of managing people, meeting objectives whilst thoroughly enjoying himself. Along the way, he danced Tango in Argentina, rode a donkey in Nicaragua and collected a bunch of wacky costumes from his annual sales meetings, which will now come in handy in New Orleans. He provided much fodder for Dilbert cartoons – loved to poke fun at systems and processes. His subordinates loved him but I have no doubt that most of his management was only too glad to see the backside of him when he retired last march.

So does he miss work with all the staff, status and benefits?

Nope. GRAK was made for Big Easy living. It suits his constitution. Everybody who knows Gerry can just see him eating, drinking and making merry just like, well, just like he tried to do when he worked.

People sometimes ask us: “So what do you do all day in New Orleans?”

Can you believe that? People actually wonder what we do all day in the Big Easy – in a city with more bars,restaurants and clubs open than before Katrina; where even funerals are cause for celebration, with brass bands leading friends and strangers alike second-lining through the streets. In short, we do what we would do in any city in the USA but in the edgy, heady atmosphere of nonstop music and wacky worlds within worlds. The Spanish speakers have arrived en masse since Katrina, so we're noticing a lot more Latin spicing up the jazz. It's true - jazzy salsas and sambas and big crowds dancing to them! Oh yeah, Gerry's latest project is learning Arabic. Not to be outdone, I'm thinking of learning a new language too. Maybe Greek or Mandarin. Not sure yet. Should brush off Latin for work at El Tigre.

While walking around the Quarter yesterday afternoon, I noticed a lot more police and horses on Bourbon Street and figured that it was a show for the International Law Enforcement Convention in town this week.

So I asked a policewoman, “Is all this to show off your horses or for crowd control – bet cha a bunch of drunken Police Chiefs must get pretty rowdy!”

“Both!” She said.

New Orleans living has been tough on me – wining, dining and hitting the theatres & jazz clubs with Gerald and still getting up early for Taiji at Woldenberg Riverfront Park.

The riverfront is perfect for Taiji because the runners stay to the pathways and in their own I-Pod worlds and I get to workout in peace on the grass. That is, until this morning when an Asian fellow showed up. It had to happen sooner or later. Now this is someone who’s really got the moves! He started off with a noisy version of qigong – something Patricia had been trying to get me to do. I call it spanking yourself. But this guy was really going to it – slapping and pounding himself and making such a racket that it rattled me right out of my nice, albeit amateurish, Taiji form. And then he started his martial art routine.

Oh yeah.... uh huh...., he got de moves!... All right! ... Who d’at!

But I have faith. In 20 years or so - when I’m a very old lady - maybe I’ll have the moves too!
Si dios quiere.

Countdown to New Orleans

An airline ticket to New Orleans – departing Costa Rica September 12th.

Just the thought of that brightens Gerry’s day. And lately, that’s about the only thing that does: He’s going to New Orleans and leaving all this dreadful mess behind….

….all the drenching rains, the landslides, the muck, the bone jarring detours, the housekeeper’s kitchen with all her cats and kids, the solar power monster, the construction site…

New Orleans Here We Come! Back home to our peaceful flat in the Vieux Carre, where everything works and all is orderly. Where we can walk up for some Oysters (raw, followed by barbecued) at the bar at the Red Fish Grill and then down to Frenchman Street for some great music. Or maybe visit some friends uptown. Or drive out to a Bayou…

There is so much to fill up your senses in New Orleans!

But Gerry still has to get through 10 more days of Costa Rica before landing in our beloved Big Easy – and he’s running hard so that there will NOT be any delays. It’s been exhausting – running all day – finances, construction, employees, that dreadful detour – but soon, soon – NEW ORLEANS.

Mother Nature has not cooperated. After several days of heavy rains, the old road from Ciudad Colon to Rodeo collapsed into the river leaving a great gaping, mucky hillside. Big roadwork machinery is now digging a new road out of the mountain. Currently, it looks like a great Sea of Mud with a slashed mud road through it. Many people have sunk in the muck. The other night, a lady carrying her baby sank up to her chest in muck before getting pulled out by other travelers. She left her boots behind, stuck in the mud.

Tomorrow, if it is not raining, Gerald will make the climb – all outfitted in his wellingtons and walking stick to reach a taxi waiting on the other side of the landslide. This is just one of many reasons why Gerald is counting the days.

For all our friends and family reading this: New Orleans is still a blast to visit. True, population is 50% of Pre-Katrina levels while crime remains as bad. CNN is still focusing on the rebuilding problems but these are all in areas that you never would have visited before Katrina. The bad news is that those areas still exist and still need help.

The good news is that there are more restaurants and bars open now than before Katrina. So come and enjoy them. Eat, drink and be merry. And in doing so, you will do your bit to help ALL New Orleans recover.

Marooned

August 28, 2007, 6AM

Road Works Collapsed last night. Situation worse than before. Construction workers wading through thigh-high mud to catch bus home.

Road workers should not have cut that massive higueron (Ficus sp. w/huge roots supported entire hillside).

Landslides. Jimmy sank up to his neck in muck – bystanders pulled him out.

Rodeo villagers moving in with friends/family in Ciudad Colon so folks can get to work and kids go to school.
UPAZ students now bused to university in San Jose.

Huge Ceiba branch down and road blocked to Piedras Negras.

News at El Tigre:
Construction workers coming through by foot from Ciudad Colon. Los Aventureros.

Gerald is not a happy camper.

Monkeys making peace with dogs- that is – monkeys playing with dogs, shaking tree branches at them, pruning laurel trees nicely at the top – dogs tire of barking at monkeys and dodging sticks and hurled fruits and return back to me. We sit quietly watching the monkeys.
More lessons for us all.

Back at Tex Mex - Road Reopened Briefly

Yes, here we are back at Tex Mex. Gerry had an appointment early this morning and didn’t want to deal with the long detour out of Rodeo. So yesterday, when the Municipality briefly reopened the road again, we grabbed our chance and packed a bag. We were going to Tex Mex! It was rough getting up the mucky, newly cut road though. Even at low gear, the Jeep lost grip part way up and we started sliding sideways towards the bamboo trees…and the gorge far, far below, before finally gaining grip again and up and around the steep curve. I think the police closed the road again soon afterwards.

But we made it to Tex Mex ! And it was a fun evening! We dined on grilled fish, served along with copious amounts of wine/margaritas and we checked emails and chatted with Abby, who was sitting at the next table.

Early this morning, Gerry left to renew his firearm license way over on the other side of town. In Costa Rica, getting a firearm license requires a sign-off by an approved psychologist, and passing both theoretical and practical tests. This morning, Gerry’s doing both, including firing off rounds with his dutifully licensed firearm before the licensing authorities. Presumably he has to hit the target with reasonable enough frequency to get his renewal. Dr. Bob thinks the hardest part will just be trying to get there. Traffic through Moravia at rush hour!

Our other Jeep is at the body-shop (after the maid crashed it) so I’m waiting for Gerry back here at Tex Mex. As soon as he returns, we will pick up the other car and drive home separately via the Jaris route, if the road is still closed. If it’s open, I hope I don’t crash the green Jeep down into that gorge the same day as picking it up from that brand new paint job!

Work on the road has gone faster than expected. Considering that the University for Peace is temporarily operating out of the Ciudad Colon gym, not to mention the inconvenience to residents, and without even going into the construction problems, the situation couldn’t continue for long! But as realists, we also resigned ourselves into a long, troublesome wait.

However, the Mora Municipality sprang into action just after the road collapsed. They declared an emergency and released funds to a private contractor within 24 hours. Makes you wonder but hey, we were pleased! We were shocked, though not surprised, when the heavy equipment cut down two massive trees – a Ficus and a Guanacaste – in order to cut the alternate route. Now with all the soil moved around, it’s hard to discern the new road from the old. But those trees with their massive root systems have supported the whole embankment for a long time, and the entire hillside will become less stable now that they are cut. I just hope that engineers are on this! We shall see how it looks when we return home today.

Meanwhile, I spent the entire morning at Tex Mex practicing Taiji, just like old times! I haven’t been practicing at all out at Tigre, except for a quick and empty form now and then… I justified not practicing by thinking that climbing all about the forest is a form of practice, just like horseback riding or, doing anything really. But there’s really no substitute for taking time for Practice.

So what keeps us so busy out at El Tigre? What do we do all day? Well…Gerry has been an absolute saint, and has been managing the construction and financial issues – a full time job – while I have more time to attend to other matters, like getting :
…dog prints all over my clean slacks first thing in the morning…
…observing the forest and being a part of it…
…working in the garden – it has been such a wonderful planting season with all the rain…
…walking the dogs on the pasture trail to visit the horses…
…finding that horseflies are biting the horses, so applying the citronella lotion we prepared for them this morning, and observing that the lotion works – that the flies no longer wish to land on the horses.
…and it’s easy to lose sense of time in the forest world.
I go out early in the morning, usually with three dogs in tow. Another time, I shall write about the dogs and the monkeys. After hours lost in the magic of the forest, Gerry will call me if I’m badly late for breakfast and suggest that I ‘get my ass up here’. And up I go and we have breakfast together.

After breakfast, it’s time to get busy…managing a property using solar power on old battery banks…producing enough power to serve household and construction needs … minimizing generator time to conserve diesel…instructing workers on erosion control all over the Finca…improving drainage….planting at areas of high water flow… rearranging plants for a more functional garden…
…accepting that living on a mountain means water flow and erosion control lessons very early on….and doing experiments on reducing water flow…and doing all sorts of botanical experiments along the way as we walk the Finca. What would work better for a horsefly repellant? Shall I try a little Eucalytus with the Citronella? Bad idea! Matchi had an allergic reaction. Revelation - FOOL - Conduct bug repellant experiments on my own skin, not on that of my animals! If my potions are safe and effective on my skin, then they certainly won’t harm my horses! Many, many lessons learned... from making mistakes.

I learned this lesson very early at El Tigre : Mountain living requires coming into balance with gravity. That’s harder to do than it sounds. I try to achieve balance by practicing Taiji - and, when Gerry agrees to dance with me (never often enough) - Ballroom Dancing. But lately, I’ve been able to come into balance by moving around on the mountain. In fact, now that I can achieve balance just by climbing around the forest, that’s all I do!
It’s easy to never leave El Tigre at all…only too easy…

Gerry just phoned : He got 100% on both theoretical and practical tests- such a sharp-shooter! Now all he has to do is get back over here in one piece from Moravia. And then the long drive via Jaris.
Stay tuned on the Road.

Road Closed to Tigre, UPAZ

We believe that Finca El Tigre is Carbon Neutral. In fact, we put more oxygen out there than carbon dioxide and this even though we drive two gas guzzling V-8 Grand Cherokee Jeeps. How do we get away with that and still be carbon neutral? Well, as an aside, we would much rather sell the jeeps and drive a brand new Turbo Diesel, 4x4 Toyota Hilux Pick-up truck. At least this we does. The other we would prefer a Land Rover Defender diesel truck. But in any case, we decided that the jeeps were cheaper to run than to sell. Gas guzzlers are getting lousy prices on the secondary market in Costa Rica right now. But even so, we’re still putting out more O2 than CO2 - and you are welcome to come over and quantify the whole thing but you will need plenty of gas to get here – or better yet - a helicopter.

Heavy rains knocked out the road between Ciudad Colon and El Rodeo this morning, which means all of us living on the road from the rickety bridge at Ciudad Colon to El Rodeo… University for Peace… El Tigre… Piedras Negras and beyond, all have to use an alternative route for some time to come. The road subsided this morning, just as Armando was driving back from Ciudad Colon with supplies for the renovations. He said that the road seemed to dip when he drove up to Ciudad Colon at around 6:45AM. Shortly afterwards, on his return trip, the steep dip in the road had already begun to sink... he managed to get over it – with a big tthuuuunk to his axle – but just. An instant later, the road subsided by nearly half a meter and, clearing that precipice, Armando could feel the ground ‘softening’ beneath him and saw the asphalt road crackling up out in front. There was simply no way, he said to me on the phone, that Victor could pop over to Tigre with 3 meters of lava stone. Ni modo! Nobody was driving down that road for some time to come- maybe months. Not by motorcycle or horseback either. The only way through now was by foot – and walking quickly and softly so as not to destabilize the ground further.

This gloomy news is still sinking in today. Worse, the locals tell us that the road remains highly unstable and continues to sink on down towards the river. That section of the road has been showing signs of instability for months but it took over 12 hours of heavy rain – backwash from hurricane Dean crossing over Belize and Mexico - to completely destabilize the hillside leading up to Ciudad Colon.

Oy! What a plaga of hurricanes. First New Orleans – GIRLS GO WILD Katrina & Wilma. Now Mean Hurricane Dean makes mischief with us in Costa Rica.

And yes, we are still renovating the house. At the moment we are crammed into one guestroom in the main house. We open the door and look out onto a construction site, which is how we have been living since returning from New Orleans back in May. Despite this latest set-back with the collapsed road, we still plan to leave for New Orleans mid- September and hope to return back to El Tigre in December to a finished house – after over 18 months of renovations. Still, with the road closed, we might have to be flexible over the next few months in everything…

Guess that means spending even more time mucking about in the forest out at Tigre. Sounds great to me! Living at Tigre has been like a honeymoon. We finally live here – sure, cramped into one little guest room with all our earthly possessions but….

… oh how the gardens come alive with butterflies –Polly, I shall try to upload photos to the blog as soon as I get the camera back out of storage. There are so many colorful species fluttering all over the Lantana borders and all around us - watching this magical scene quite takes your breath away. And then there is the forest… there is so much living to do here. Until today, I haven’t had the time to sit down and write.

Gerry spent the entire day checking out the two alternative dirt, gravel and mud routes we have into Ciudad Colon from El Rodeo (and obviously the reverse). One alternative is via Piedras Negras to La Guacima, Belen, and Santa Ana – about 45km; and the other (more scenic route) is via Piedras Negras to Jaris, La Palma, and the road to Puriscal – about 35km. Both will be used as we rearrange our lives to adapt to these changed circumstances.

Stay tuned for latest situation on the road. In the meantime, we must cancel all hikes and botanical visits from now until the road has been sorted out. You certainly do not wish to drive an additional 30km of rough terrain to visit us. Think of the carbon you would be spewing into the air! Yikes! Guess we’ll be doing the same and that shoots our carbon footprint all to hell!

Peril in Paradise

Big news in the village this week – a snake bit a local gardener, which landed him in the hospital for three days. The poor fellow was working out in his field wearing sandals (no no) and stepped on a Cascabel Mudo (Mute Rattlesnake). That’s why you see Costa Rican field workers wearing rubber boots all day long. I wear them too! Snakes chomp into rubber, not flesh. Mute Rattlesnakes are quite rare at Finca El Tigre. We have Terciopelo – Fer de Lance -and they are much worse. At least the Cascabel Mudo will give you warning if you weed your garden a bit too close to where he’s napping – he will kind of hiss at you – give you a chance to back off. The Terciopelo gets more easily irritated and might strike you without any warning at all! And believe me - you don’t want to get bitten in the upper body by one of those rascals! You will almost certainly survive a snake bite to the foot but a bite in the neck would not bode well no matter how fast the helicopter gets you to the hospital.

It goes without saying that you need to put your full attention to weeding a tropical garden to avoid mishaps. Not just with snakes – there are a whole slew of biting insects out there that will ruin your day, not to mention certain exotic creepy crawlers that will burn your skin after just the slightest touch.

You also have to watch where you’re going out in the forest. Always remember the well known adage: ‘Look where you’re walking – stop to look up.’ If you don’t take care, there are prickles and spines and all sorts of ways to get burned, stabbed, cut up and worse.
So why do we do it? Why court danger out in the forest when we could just cut some decent trails and have a nice relaxing hike? Well, we do cut the trails – afterwards. What happens is we start out wanting to see something – like a tree we want to identify. But to get over to it, we have to scale a mountain, holding onto tree roots for dear life to keep from tumbling down, then scrambling over rocks and more steep terrain until finally we reach the tree. We take a look. Is it? It is! It’s a Tempisque! In fact, we found two - yes two -rare Tempisque trees growing just 1 meter apart from each other – even rarer! Generally, hardwoods grow scattered apart from each other in nature. What a find! Needless to say, we now have a nice trail so you can see the two Tempisques too without much physical difficulty.

I believe you have to be a bit of an adrenaline type to live in a tropical forest. I get my adrenaline kick by riding horses. We don’t do dressage training out at Tigre – we fly! We take our horses and trot down the mountain at a good clip, pacing them for their own good. We reach a nice grassy pasture with rolling hills that extends some 5 kilometers across the valley, and here we fly. The horses relax and we go from a nice extended canter to a full exhilarating gallop. The horses love it and so do we! We come across foot trails in the grass and ride the trails like a motorcycle – curving here and there and suddenly the trail disappears back into grassy pasture with views opening up for miles all around. Now we just joyfully fly across the pasture – me sitting or up in jumping position, depending on the terrain. We know where we’re going and we fly as a team.

However, the thrill can switch to terror in an instant– my horse could stumble over a rock and throw a shoe or, as what happened the other day, we could round a curve at full out gallop and come across a car in the middle of the lane. Here, in a split instant, time expands and attention melds with adrenaline to deal with ‘shit happens’. I’ve had my share of near-mishaps but not many accidents. Partly it’s judgment – no more racing on the road! I really have to apologize to my neighbor Gabriela who was just minding her own business, driving around a bend and confronting the likes of us. No harm done but my horse, Volcan, had to spin a tight corner to keep from plummeting us both down the mountainside. He is such a good boy!
But it’s not all adrenaline. There are just instants here and there. A hike in the forest is mostly just magical. When hiking alone, I stay to the trails if Armando and his trusty machete are not accompanying me to hack through the obstacles off-trail. But sometimes the trail hasn’t been cut for a while and the brush has grown a bit higher and I just kind of push the envelope. But if the going gets too rough, I always turn back to the trail.

But the most terrifying peril of all out at Tigre is completely out of our control – thunder and lightening storms –all we can do is sit and tremble in fear with our dogs.

Jazzfest - New Orleans Counterpoint

Can you drink the water there? You sure can! In fact, it’s the only water that I drink. That bottled Fiji and Icelandic water costs more than a drinkable Chardonnay, so I stick with what comes from the tap.

We’re talking New Orleans water here, not Costa Rica. We are completely off the grid there – we only drink our own well water and use solar power. And with the rolling blackouts occurring all over Costa Rica right now, our friends might not think we’re so crazy any more.

It’s Jazz Fest and the crowds are big. They’ve come to see

…Rod Stewart, Norah Jones, Jerry Lee Lewis, Brad Paisley, ZZ Top, Dr. John, Van Morrison, Charmaine Neville…

and oh how the list goes on! But if you want to hear the big names, you’ve got to get there early and mark out your spot by plopping down your chair. People with kids bring a blanket. If you leave and take your chair with you, then someone else is going to plop right down in your spot. When you want something to eat, send your husband out for the Muffulettas and Daiquiris – he’s the hunter. Pssst, guys, the hunting is half the fun and your wife will have a blast staying back and talking with all the neighbors.

However, if you arrive late, then you will get caught in the slooooow moving river of humanity. You will get caught in a very slow current going one way or the other and there’s little you can do about it but just go with the flow and bob your head to the music. We saw one woman with a baby stroller actually trying to move counter-flow by calling out “Sorry, stroller…sorry, stroller…” But nobody could do anything. There’s no moving against the flow.

A better strategy is to head over to one of the many smaller stages and listen to incredible jazz, funk and blues by some of the best talent New Orleans has to offer. You will be able to sit down in chairs provided inside the tent and there’s plenty of room to dance and Second-Line around the aisles. At the Economy Hall Tent, the crowd spends the whole day dancing and second-lining to guys like Pete Fountain and Leroy Jones. If all the chairs are taken when you arrive to listen to say, Kermit Ruffins and the Barbeque Swingers, just wait a few minutes. Soon, people will be getting up and moving on – hoping to catch somebody at another Stage, and you can move right in and sit down.

The day goes fast. When you’re moving from one Stage to another, there’s plenty of feasting and drinking to do along the way. There is no better culinary experience than just sampling all the food that New Orleans has to offer at Jazz Fest. It will take the entire two weekends to get through everything and it’s a lot easier than making reservations for dinner. I don’t think there is a festival anywhere in the country that offers better food.

So the day flies by and you soon queue up for the bus ride back to the Sheraton Hotel. Wherever you stay, remember that you need to walk to the Sheraton for the bus to Jazz Fest. It’s the easiest way if you haven’t marked out a parking spot in somebody’s front lawn many years ago. Some people just go to bed after a day at the Fest, but if you have the energy, come on down to the Quarter for the party! There’s music playing everywhere that goes on all night.

Forget about dining at the first-tier restaurants like Commander’s Palace, Brennan’s, etc….they’ve all been booked long in advance. You could try smaller, trendier restaurants of which there are many, but it’s going to be hectic. During Jazz Fest, we head over to our local spots near our flat between Iberville and Bienville.

After dinner, there are music clubs who feature people you missed earlier in the day and then there’s Bourbon Street for the huge, drinking party crowds. I always like a few minutes of Bourbon Street just for the amusement of the goofy costumes and to pet the horses that the police use for crowd control. If your feet ache from all the walking, you could always take a carriage ride through the Quarter and laugh at all the festivities in comfort.

Then it’s definitely time to get back and go to bed. It all starts over again tomorrow morning.

But wait a minute! What about all the crime? Yes, homicides occur regularly in New Orleans but the vast majority of them happen in neighborhoods that you’ve never heard of. One rare and notable exception happened in the Quarter a few days ago. Two apprenticed waiters at Antoines had an altercation and one of them left in an ambulance. The rest of the horrified waiters, nicely spiffed up in their white shirts and black ties, quickly cleaned up the mess before the doors opened for the dining public.

Got to go! It’s already 11AM and the Saturday crowds will be even bigger than they were yesterday!

Innocent of all Charges

First things first: Innocent of all Charges... As it should be… Justice was served… Which is not always a sure thing in Central America.

We were both relieved to put this trial behind us and, after some celebration and a long night of restful, desperately needed sleep, Gerry returned once again to our beloved New Orleans. He has taken an active interest in the rebuilding efforts and particularly the preservation of our neighborhood in the Vieux Carre.

But not so fast. Gerry has a job to do! During all the nine years we have been in Costa Rica, a chum of GRAK’s has been taking care of his arsenal, including his cherished antique shotguns and rifles. Mostly he just polishes and admires them but yes, Gerry is a sharp shooter, both at long range and in movement. He’s not much of a hunter though. The only animal I’ve ever seen him kill was a rabid raccoon back at our farm in Pennsylvania. One shot to the head from 30 meters and the raccoon went instantly from this cruel world to hopefully a better one. Gerry hates to see an animal suffer.

In any case, Gerry and Jim (AKA Spock) loaded the guns into Spock’s pickup truck and headed off for a road trip from Jim’s house in Bucks County, PA to our flat in New Orleans. En route, they will stop to visit pals in Baltimore and North Carolina. I just hope they don’t get arrested and thrown in jail for transporting firearms interstate. I can just see GRAK on CNN arrested as a terrorist. So many home-grown British ones these days and my goodness, here’s one of those murderous Brits on Stateside soil! And we have it on good word that the State Troopers in PA will arrest you even if you have an unopened bottle of good malt scotch visible from the back window of your car – especially if you have Canadian license plates. Yes there are many perils ahead for GRAK and Spock. At least they are not driving with Canadian license plates.

Meanwhile, I remain in Costa Rica, managing the construction and other issues out at Tigre. Many friends have asked us why the construction is taking so long. 18 months and counting! My God, one friend exclaimed, you should have fired them a year ago! My only response is – patience, patience. There is a reason for our madness. We have complete confidence in our architect, Luis Flores (AKA The Professor) and his seasoned team. We shall be moving into the Tigre house when we return from New Orleans on May 8th, just after Jazz Fest. The construction still won’t be done, but we will be living out at Tigre at last.

But yes, in the meantime, I am still sleeping at TexMex...

…And spending the days out at Tigre. Yesterday, Armando and I began designing the gardens nearest to the house and pool. We plan to plant several large, flowering trees in the pasture just below, which will provide us with quite a show some day, perhaps in 30 some years.

I asked Armando if he thought we would still be able to hike the way we do when we are 80+ years old. He didn’t have a doubt of it. Of course we would! It’s a matter of habit. If we hike regularly this way now, why should the routine change 30 years from now? Now that’s the sort of thing Polly would say!

As we were talking, suddenly we heard a large swarm of Africanized bees flying overhead. It was an unmistakable buzz that grew louder as it approached, bzzzz’ed overhead just above us and then slowly receded as the swarm continued its way east, searching for a place to build the new hive. As always, we grew silent as the bees passed by overhead. Respectful… Sending silent messages to spirit that they move on, away from the stables. They do…moving on towards the hamlet of Rodeo.

The above situation reminds me of the first time I felt an earthquake in Costa Rica. I was in a local greenhouse to buy some parsley plants when suddenly, the earth moved under my feet. It felt like a sudden jolt...jolt. I stood still, waiting. Then it passed and nothing more happened. I still wanted to buy that parsley. But it was impossible. From the instant of the first jolt, the shopkeeper woman began screaming and running all over the place, opening doors, screaming for her babies. I waited for a few minutes but finally left without buying the parsley. She obviously had experienced worse earthquakes than this one. It goes without saying that the Tigre house foundation extends deep, deep down. I once asked the construction workers: Why are you digging so deep for just a stairway? They looked at me like I was crazy. “For the earthquakes, Señora!”

It’s a humbling feeling, that in any second…but at the same time it reminds us to live each moment! Just in case shit happens – like earthquakes or hurricanes or Africanized bees. Africanized bees generally attack if you disturb them or get too close to their hive. Armando told me what to do it if attacked by Africanized bees:

“If you can, run into the house or jump into the pool. If you are close to a tree, run round and round it fast as you can. The circular motion confuses the bees and they start to fly up and away from you – allowing you to run off in a zig zag. If you don’t have a tree to run around in circles, then run zig-zag protecting just your eyes with your arm and don’t ever give up. Never fall down or roll. That might work if you’re on fire but not for the bees. Too many of them…You have to outrun them.”

We continued our way down the Guayabon trail to find some flowering vines to reproduce for the garden. We figure that if the vines do well in the forest, then they will do brilliantly in our composted soil back in the gardens. Yes, even if I never ride my horses ever again, I shall still keep them for their treasured manure – what we call black gold! We found a lovely variety of the Petrea volubilis – in full glorious bloom and also a yellow variety of Pyrostegia (Bignoniac.). The red P.venusta species is everywhere but not seen a yellow one before. We also found a ton of Lorito seeds (Cojoba arborea) but we were too late for the Ceibo verde (Pseudobombax septenatum). We did note that new Ceibo verde leaves unfold reddish as opposed to Ceiba pentandra leaves, which start fresh-green. It’s so awesome when the deciduous trees leaf out. It reminds me of spring-time in the north, but here in the tropics, the fresh new leaves add tonal texture to the darker, more brilliant evergreens, such as the Ficus, Jorco, Ajoche, Urucas, etc. By the way, the Tabebuias- Cortez Amarillo and Roble de la Sabana are in full mouth-dropping bloom. Also blooming: Jacaranda, Poro (smaller ones), Cassia fistula and a slew of flowering vines.

It started to rain a bit earlier this season than usual so we lost some of the seeds which fell to earth back in February. Interesting… It’s been raining regularly now at Tigre but very little or no rain back in Ciudad Colon or Santa Ana. I believe that when the Clay Colored Robins call for rain, they have a lot more success if they live in the forest. I have seen it with my own eyes and have VERIFIED this now 3 times this past month. Rain falls first in the forest. In our case, the clouds come in from the west and just start getting darker and lower as they roll into Tigre. It takes a few more weeks before the rain finally extends to the dry, dusty city areas. This is well known already but gratifying to confirm. Yes! The forest is contributing a watershed to humanity!

Walking Spirits?

We used to think of fallen trees in terms of loss and sadness for a beloved tree. Now we see it as a great opportunity. I was out hiking today with Forestry Engineers Manuel Viquez and Yamileth (and all the children) when we came across a large fallen tree - a Nispero. We all became quite excited because, in the great battle in the forest, a clearing to the sun is a coveted dream of every struggling forest tree trying to survive. We shall be able to use the fallen Nispero in many ways at the Finca and, at first glance around the newly sunny clearing, could recognize seedlings of Jorco (Garcinia intermedia), Calophyllum, Cenizaro, Ingas, more Nisperos and a bunch of pioneer trees. What a thrill!

One of the smaller branches became Barry's new walking stick. A few weeks ago, I broke Barry's beautifully painted walking stick into two pieces. How did I manage that? I whacked the ground with it just in front of our dog, Spotty, who at that moment was straddling and tearing into one of our chickens. A bewildered Barry reported afterwards - never get her mad! Needless to say, I felt terrible about it so asked Armando to repair his stick. By the way, both chicken and dog survived the incident. Armando tried gluing Barry's walking stick back together but realized that it was made of a soft wood, probably Guazuma. We decided to make Barry a new walking stick. Armando crafted one out of the fallen hardwood and heat dried it to make it lightweight yet very strong. This very fine walking stick is a work of indigenous art and superior function. This stick goes to Barry.

But the excitement of the fallen Nispero wasn't the only highlight of my hike with Manuel and Yamileth! We took the new trail into the old forest, which Armando had just finished this past season and soon came across an area of rocks that seemed arranged in concentric circles. Armando already knew of this place and conjectured that it was once a tool-making daycamp for indigenous people in the past. Manuel began searching amonst the rocks and soon discovered proof - a rock that clearly had been worked upon and probably discarded when it broke. Then we found another rock that looked like it had been fashioned into a large stone mortar. Now we were really excited and discussed how the Huetar people might have used the site. We imagined a group of guys sitting around, make tools together and talking just like modern guys now do on the tennis court and back at the locker room.

Armando reminded us of the time, many years ago while still a child, he came across a large, stone, animal crafted bench at the indigenous cemetary, located near the Tigre waterfalls. Next day, he returned with a friend to show him but the stone animal had disappeared. The locals describe this phenomenon as the 'walking spirits' trying to escape the humans. Did the stone walk away or was it pilfered? We don't know but I decided to hedge by bets. All stone work will remain in situ (for future archaeologists), and we will carefully screen who we take to the indigenous remains at Tigre. Thankfully, most hikers just view the sites as a common place pile of rocks so the spirits should be appeased.

We were so excited about the stone workers that we nearly missed a rare variety of Vanilla orchid vines climbing about a fallen tree. This was big news for my Forest Engineering friends because their latest mission (and they have many - elmundoforestal.com) is to rescue rare orchids and other epiphytes from the dry forest and reproduce them. We quickly made a deal. Manuel could take one complete Orchid vine, complete with root (it's hemi-epiphytic) and return to me some potted Vanilla ornamentals plants complete with trellis. Done! We shook hands on the deal and continued exploring the new trail.

And then,
WE FOUND A NEW SPECIES!!!
Actually, the species had already been identified - Diospyros digyna (Ebenaceae) - but it was the first time we had come across it at Tigre. Locals call it Sapote Negro or Mabola and it's known for its edible fruit and shiny seeds. While discussing the properties of this beautiful tree, my favorite dog Flopsy came over and began eating the fallen fruit - he clearly like it! And he's not dead yet! Also on the new trail, we also came across more Nispero (Manilkara chicle), Roble Coral (Terminalia amazonia), Ron Ron (Astronium graveolens), Ojoche Colorado (Brosimum colorado) and a bunch more already described elsewhere.

As we finished our hike, we discussed plans for documenting the new trails with GPS waypoints on AutoCad and making some new maps. We also have plans for gridding out the charrales and young forests for work into the future. Manuel and Armando will begin this work soon after I leave Costa Rica for New Orleans.

Yes - I leave TexMex and Costa Rica behind on April 8th and join Gerry in New Orleans for the upcoming Vieux Carre and Jazz Fests. Talk about a counterpoint to tropical forestry!

Now, for all you GRAK fans,
TODAY IS THE DAY!
Gerry returned to court this afternoon for his final session in this trial. I tried to go with him -even had a charming 'supportive wife' outfit all picked out - but he preferred that I stay here. He would have enough support from his entourage of lawyers and colleagues. Will Gerry manage to stay out of jail? Only the Costa Rican Judge knows for sure. If all goes well, then Gerry flies back out of Costa Rica tomorrow and returns to his beloved New Orleans.

I shall remain here at TexMex and deal with construction out at Tigre until April 8th, when I will finally join him. Si dios permite.

The Morning After

There is nothing more joyous than a walk in a tropical forest the morning after the first drenching rain - after more than 4 months of drought. Armando is half indigenous and very much a man of few words. In fact, more than once he's looked at me kind of startled when I've launched into trivial small talk with him. Women talk more than men in general but pair a gregarious North American with an indigenous Costa Rican, and you've got both extremes. We generally speak very much to the point - when to gather Lonchocarpus seeds or how to plant living fence rows... and then silence. Well that morning after the first rain, we were both silent with wonder.

We could both sense a dramatic change in the forest. Everything seemed more alive and the air around us felt charged with happy energy. The rain woke up the forest from a long slumber and we could feel the effects of this huge surge of energy all around us. Everything was cleaner and greener. It was truly a memorable walk at El Tigre.

Later, after climbing out much refreshed and invigorated, I went to the airport to pick up Gerry, who was returning back to Costa Rica for....you guessed it!

Gerry goes back to court! We cleaned his suit and had him looking quite respectable for his appearance at the Tribunales. He stayed in Costa Rica only for the court appearance and flew right back out again the next day. In fairness, he had commitments previously arranged but it sure looked like he was keen to get back to New Orleans. The good news is his final court date takes places next Monday. Will he manage to stay out of jail? Stay tuned... For those of you who would like more details about Gerry's trial, you can email him directly. BigEasyGrak@hotmail.com
Just remember to copy me because he only looks at his hotmail account when it suits him.

In any case, back on that day while waiting for Gerry at the airport, I greeted a young woman carrying one of those huge backpacks like the kind that kids haul around Europe doing their Europass tour. I pegged this kid as a volunteer and sure enough, Jenna was waiting for someone to pick her up. Her pickup was late but that's nothing unusual so when Gerry came out of arrivals, I bid her well and off I went with Gerry.

Well about 2 hours later, just as we were sitting down to lunch, Jenna shows up at the TexMex. She had waited at the airport for nearly 3 hours but nobody showed up for her. As you can imagine, she was rattled, especially since she couldn't speak any Spanish. So how did Jenna end up at the Tex Mex of all places rather than say, the Hampton Inn? Let's just call it 6 Degrees of Separation.

It was Sunday and we couldn't reach anyone and at that point, Jenna was of the mind to just get on the next flight back to New York. Forget volunteering! She just wanted to get out of Costa Rica. Luckily, thanks to Abby, who happened to arrive at TexMex for lunch just after Jenna, we managed to connect the dots. Turns out, the American Agency gave the wrong date and the Costa Ricans never expected Jenna until May. But the locals really came through for her at short notice and she left us all smiles to help with the Turtle program in Cahuita. Of course, we couldn't resist taking Jenna out to Tigre for a quick look. She will notice the huge difference between the two forests.

And yes, we are still living at the Tex Mex.

I Work at an Insane Asylum

We have a houseful of guests tonight at TexMex. After reasonable tranquility all these weeks, suddenly every room at the Inn is occupied.

Usually, I avoid other guests because they are either weird or just plain tedious. However, when I approached the cappuccino machine yesterday morning, I came across a group of young, healthy looking American kids that looked friendly. We began talking and immediately connected. I started showing them how to make coffee and asked them the usual expatriate question, “So, where are you from?”

“Michigan”, came the reply.

“Michigan! What part of Michigan are you from?”

“Kalamazoo”, said the twenty-something redhead kid.

“ I’m from Kalamazoo too! And I’ve got a T-Shirt to prove it! ‘Yes, There Really IS a Kalamazoo’.

So lots of back patting and reminiscing ensued and we had a nice coffee together. We were from different generations but felt like long lost cousins! Since then, those Kalamazoo kids have been out non-stop partying – thanks to a ‘host’ sister and her party-hardy Costa Rican tribe. The Kalamazoo Kids drank a lot of espresso this morning and the redhead declared himself off the booze forever. Yeah sure, that will last until about 6PM tonight!

I told them that the Flying Borracho Brothers would be playing at Tex Mex tonight and invited them to stop by. Maybe. They said they would definitely-maybe pop in as soon as they got back from This-Or-That Disco Club. No way. Those Kazoo Kids won’t get back until after 3AM – just like last night. And I suspect that the Borracho Brothers and their lively crowd will be back home in bed asleep. Something about different generations, but who knows? Stay tuned!

Meanwhile….
A pair of ‘Easy Riders’ from the upper Midwest stayed at TexMex a few days back. I avoided them – definitely not my cup of tea - but Gerry and Dr. Bob had a few words with them as they checked out. It was their first trip to Costa Rica and their plan was to ride their Harleys all over the country to sightsee and have some fun with the Ticas. First stop was Jaco. Dr. Bob admonished them to be careful out there. The horrible Costa Rican roads and insane drivers have produced a lot of accidents – and the bad ones almost always involve motorcycles. Easy Riders nodded indifferently and left.

Gerry turned to Dr. Bob and said, “Guess we will see those guys at CIMA Hospital!”

“Yeah”, Bob replied, “Maybe we ought to reserve a room for them right now!”

Well this is a bizarre coincidence, but not more than two hours out on the road, one of the Easy Riders skidded out of control at a curve. He sustained blunt trauma on an ankle and required some 24 stitches for cuts on his elbow and knee. And the worst of it was that he didn’t even get taken to CIMA – The 5 star version of a private hospital. Instead, the ambulance took him to the Social Security Public Hospital, San Juan de Dios. It was absolute bedlam there and the injured Easy Rider couldn’t speak any Spanish. The only English speaker they could find was a very busy physician who just didn’t have time to take care of him. His injuries weren’t life threatening so he just had to lay there in pain until they finally patched him up and sent him back home to ….

You guessed it! Back home to TexMex. Poor fellow. On the first day of his first trip to Costa Rica, he ends up with a cast on his leg. But on the bright side, he can join the crowd for the Flying Borracho Brothers tonight!

Dr. Bob just walked by and declared:

“I work at an Insane Asylum!”

I was holding a ‘Ward off Monkey’ Taiji pose at the time so not sure if his comment related to me or to his other guests.

So Where is Gerry in all this goofy mix?
Gerry left Costa Rica today for New Orleans. Yep, and leaving me here with all the construction. His original plan was not to return until May 10th. Well that pesky trial has ruined his plans once again. He has to return back here for a court appearance on March 20th. He’s furious about that and only plans to fly in for the court date and right back out to New Orleans.

Why is it so important that Gerry has to be in New Orleans? So important that he would even miss out on a British Birthday Party tomorrow for the Four Horsemen? Actually, it’s War and Death having the party. Pestilence AKA David Scott is in Jaco and Gerald AKA Famine needs to be in New Orleans. Why? Because Gerald AKA Famine needs to take delivery of his beloved Chesterfield Sofa, which arrives around the 22nd.

Tomorrow I hike down to the waterfalls for a bit of Tigre centering.

Gerry Goes to Court

Well, Gerry got back from New Orleans with his business suit alright. He brought back one suit, dress shoes, black socks, 3 ties (from which he can choose depending on his mood) and one shirt. That is correct. He only brought back ONE SHIRT.

Today and tomorrow he meets privately with his defense team: three lawyers and four corporate ‘suits’ who came from the Head Office to help plan the defense strategy and serve as witnesses. Today’s meeting takes places at the corporate offices and tomorrow they all meet again at the office of one of his Costa Rican attorneys. On Wednesday they all go to court together and defend Gerry before a Costa Rican judge.

Which day to you think Gerry is going to wear his ONE SHIRT? You got it – when the whole parade of ‘suits’ marches into the Costa Rican Tribunals on Wednesday morning.

So today, he put on his jeans and Bahamian silk shirt as usual. The only item of clothing he lacked for the ‘retired man’ picture, was his Panama hat, which is in storage. So how do you imagine all those hard-working lawyers and corporate guys responded to Gerry’s outfit?

And not to mention Gerry’s New Freedom Attitude:

“Hey! Great to see you! How’s the weather up there in New Jersey? Retirement is great! I’m busy remodeling the Costa Rica house but made time to travel to our flat in New Orleans for Mardi Gras. Actually, my primary purpose of going up there was to pick up one of my suits for our court appearance this week! Fat Tuesday was just a coincidence but hey, what a riot that was – parties of all sorts going on all over and what parades –Orpheus was the best parade by far for the floats! But Zulu was the most fun…then there were all those wild and silly costumes on Bourbon Street…and what a racket the crowds made… you couldn’t hear your cellular after 5PM … and then the cocktails and galas….and on Ash Wednesday, I jumped back on a plane to reach Costa Rica in time for this strategy session here with all of you nicely dressed gentlemen.”

Meanwhile, for all of us tree gazers, we’re in the middle of high flowering season. All you have to do is look out the window to see the spectacle – that is if you live in Costa Rica. Otherwise, go the Elmundoforestal.com to take a look at the pictures. It is just a glorious sight outside:

In bloom you have both Poro species blazing up the highways around Escazu over to Uruca with orange blooms both bright and lighter colored. Poro (Erythrina lanceolate) and Poro Gigante (Erythrina poeppigianao) species are mixed together over there but Poro Gigante predominates over at the Rodeo coffee fields. Also in bloom are the incredible Tabebuias. What a show! Both the Cortez amarilla (T. Ochracea) and the Roble Sabana (T. rosea are brightening up the terrain with a canopy full of pink and yellow blooms. You can also see the scattered, more open blooms of the Poroporo (Cochlospermum vitifolium) and the streetside yellow Oleander. Also, due to the rain we got 10 days ago, the coffee fields have all burst into bloom, filling the air with the sweet aroma of coffee flowers. And that’s just the trees! The flowering shrubbery lining the roadsides have burst into riotous colors with bougainvillea stealing the show.

The colorful spectacle is kind of like a Mardi Gras for naturalists!

Klutzy? Take Taiji or Ballroom Dancing!

You need balance and agility for rock climbing in the jungle. So how do you train for that? I study Taijiquan, specifically the original Chen style, but any style will do. Ball-room dancing also works. Anybody who can foxtrot with ease across a ballroom has enough balance to jump rocks on the river. If you happen to do both Taiji and ballroom dancing, then one will improve the other.

I’m basically a clumsy and poorly coordinated person. Gerry says that dancing with me is like hauling around a big bag of potatoes. In fact, I used to farm him out to other women at parties because I couldn’t follow him and we would end up fighting. “Just follow me, you idiot”…
“Why can’t you just shut-up and have a good time, you miserable old sod!”
“Go back on your left foot and follow me…what IS it with you???”
“Oh piss off and go dance with Penny…I’m done with you!”

Then we started dancing lessons with a professional – the beautiful and incredibly talented Lucia - and she got us moving together after the first lesson. Want to fire up your marriage? Take private dancing lessons! We learned all the ball room dances – even the Argentine Tango. The important thing is one partner has some sense of rhythm and can lead or back-lead the other. I have no natural rhythm at all so have to work hard at following my partner.

When I started Taiji, it immediately improved my balance and my ability to dance - and to do just about everything else. The mind quiets and the body relaxes.

Taiji is known to have immediate health benefits but requires some 20 plus years of training to truly excel as an internal martial art. This is true. I have been at it for 3 years and am still a beginner. My teacher trained with Master Xhang of Fan’s line in San Francisco but couldn’t truly communicate to me the internal energy for a long time. Partly I wasn’t ready but even then, she had to use Pilates-like descriptions to help me to understand and really get it.

So something happened this morning with Patricia. Suddenly, after 3 years of Taiji training, I felt the chi - impulse circling deep within. It sounds really esoteric but the feeling is real. The energy comes up and circles forward to back or side to side or any gyroscopic circle within and around the dantium – your center core. Your limbs are superfluous but carry out force through yi - attention. The impulse pulls the arms down in neutralizing force and circles up and around to give energy back (to opponent). All motion starts deep inside the center, pulling energy up from earth or down from sky. This is the spiral energy!

Also. The pushing forward always parallels opposite force with back leg pushing foot into the ground. Springing forward is never total commitment. The back foot pushes with opposite force into earth. Or rather, the stretch involves the qua – hip joints shifting through pelvis. The impulse forward circles into backwards. The tree is always rooted.

Does that make sense?

In any case, there is hope for klutzy people – Taiji and/or ballroom dancing!

Gerry goes to Mardi Gras

How did he manage this one? Well, he’s got to go to court at the end of the month to face civil and criminal charges (let him blog about his trials and tribulations), and he needs a suit. Trouble is we’ve got all his suits in storage until the Finca El Tigre house is finally remodeled. And he can’t just walk into the storage container and pull a suit out of a box, because he would have to sort through 284 boxes to find the suit and then the shoes and then a white shirt. .

It would be a lot easier to just fly up to New Orleans and pull a suit and accoutrements out of our closet in the flat. And it just so happens that the flat is located in the French Quarter. And coincidentally, he arrives the Sunday before Fat Tuesday and would depart the day after the start of Lent. And no, I doubt very much you will find him in the Cathedral on Jackson Square. So there it is. Gerry’s leaves Sunday for New Orleans and I will remain here in Costa Rica to sort out the construction.

Or will there be any construction? Yesterday afternoon, a bus from the University of Peace knocked a gaping hole into the rickety wooden bridge that connects El Rodeo with the rest of the world. Now, only cars can cross the bridge with great caution. So how do the delivery trucks get to Tigre now? Will the construction workers show up? What about all the mountain of debris they were supposed to haul out this week? I heard a truck arrived at Tigre before the bridge got whacked and they removed all the recyclable steel, plastic and iron. Well that’s great. But they left the rest of the debris in a huge mess worse than before. And now the bridge has a big gaping hole in it. What more can happen to delay construction? What could possibly be worse than finding the Finca completely cut off by a broken bridge? And when will they fix it? Remember: We are in Costa Rica. Nothing gets fixed until, well, until the bridge is completely unpassable. That's just about now. Just about. Cars can still get through so nothing much will get done until some unlucky chap breaks through and plumments down to the river. Then maybe.

So guess we'll be spending even more time here at Hotel TexMex. We have some whacky guests in here at the moment to keep us amused. There’s this crazy German fellow: “I am German and I vil stay a veek!” Oh lucky us! He’s either psychotic or on hallucinogens. He actually believes he can advise us on our Federal Tax Returns. Now is that crazy or what? Then there are the two gals from Arenal. They do everything from selling horse-tack online to producing music events. Was it Bob Dylan they wanted to bring in? I can’t recall. Much of what they said was this stream of consciousness. Then there’s the stunning blonde traveling alone with her baby. Came from way up north near the border with Nicaragua and en route to Chicago. What was she doing up there in nomad country? Was she a Peace Corp volunteer who became infatuated with a Costa Rican cowboy? We didn’t ask. We pretty much stay to ourselves here at Hotel TexMex.

It's TOO Hot to Hike! Reading "Tropical Nature"

It’s hot. Too hot to go outside. The sun rays come straight down and burn and dry out everything. It feels like Guanacaste and, since Tigre is nearly 900meters above sea level, that means Guanacaste must be blistering hot right now. Actually, the outside Temperature Gauge says it’s just 88F, but the tropical sun this time of year makes it feel hotter. It amazes me how people come to Costa Rican beaches and just lounge about out in full sun, lazily roasting and broiling away. Many return home with burns they will never forget. I know a few of them. Once took a young, healthy hiker from NYC to the hospital for heat stroke. Slathering on a ton of sunscreen staves off the burn but makes you swelter even more! I try to stay inside and only venture out early mornings or after 4PM.

Friends up north just snort and say, ‘Oh sure! Poor you! Up here in Michigan today, we’re getting an arctic blast with wind chill temps at 35 below!’

Perhaps that explains why they prostate themselves under the tropical sun when they visit! Paying homage to the great sun God! Very powerful in these parts!

We do have much activity during the dry season. This is the time for cutting new trails, renovating structures and general maintenance. It’s the time for collecting seeds out in the forest. Armando and his workers are of indigenous descent, with dark skin and wiry bodies – it’s rare to even see these guys sweat. They just go out there and work without commenting much on the weather other than to make an oblique reference to it, like: “Feels nice in cool where we’re cutting that trail down there in the forest”.

It’s nice and cool down there all right but when you climb out of the forest into the blazing sun, you still have to hike another 20 minutes up to the stables. This is the time of year for hiking very early or just before sunset.

One major feature of the dry season is that many deciduous trees burst into bloom and are giving us a mouth-dropping show. The forest looks different during the dry season when viewed from overhead, which I do from the balcony of the house. Many trees have dropped leaves, giving them a dramatic, sculptural appearance, which really contrasts with the evergreen trees behind them. Now you can really see the architecture of the massive Guanacaste trees, not to mention the Cedrelas and so many others!

With the flowers, you can point out trees usually well hidden during the leafy rainy season. Found a Poro Poro (Cochlospermum vitifolium, BIXAC) for the first time when it suddenly burst into bright, yellow bloom. Also noted the mimosa white blooms of the Guayaquil, which so many of my botany friends still insist is a Cenizaro. But the petiole gland nailed that one last season and the white flowers confirm it. We’ve learned to accept that trees aren’t what they seem at Tigre.

Maybe I will go take a closer look at it early tomorrow morning. Before it gets too hot. In the meantime, someone gave me a book by Adrian Forsyth & Ken Miyata called “Tropical Nature”, which reads just like having a nice chat with some old friends.

This is just an awesome book for naturalists. Here’s something I didn’t know: Human scat is a highly desired commodity in the forest! It’s the caviar for beetles. As soon as you take a dump in the forest, you stay around and watch the battle that soon ensues as smaller beetles battle for a clump of dung and bigger beetles come in and feast on the eggs and larvae of the smaller beetles. The whole scene is like a huge battle scene straight out of a science fiction movie. According to the authors, the whole thing is over within just a few hours and there is no trace left of the human excrement.

“Tropical Nature” is such a blast to read! Everybody reading this boring blog would just love the style of this book. How do you convey the feeling you get when immersed in the lungs of the earth? The authors really bring it across. The book mostly talks about the lowland forests where the eco-system is so efficient, not much is wasted on the forest ground.

At Tigre, we are at a higher elevation with longer dry season so have a lot more deciduous trees – about 40% mas o menos – so there is a huge leaf drop in the forest soon after it stops raining and the soil gets nicely composted in parts. Great for planting seedlings! But we have to take care while hiking trails thick with leaves. You can’t just strut along kicking up heaps of leaves as you go because you might wake up a sleeping snake. I will write about snakes another time. We have the highly poisonous Fer de Lance (Terciopelo) and also the Coral Snake. We also have many species of non-poisonous. The trick is to understand their habits and instincts and behave accordingly.

We are still camping out at Hotel Tex Mex, where the huge, varnished wood verandahs provide us with much coveted shade during the hottest part of the day. There’s always a nice cool breeze wafting through and the setting is just perfect for doing Chen Taiji forms. If we want something to eat, we wander over to the restaurant where everybody knows us and will cook to our whims.

We don’t know how much longer we will be here but it’s nearly 4pm and time to venture outside.

Hikers - We Cut a New Trail!

Yesterday, Armando proudly announced that he had completed the new trail. He’d finally done it! He’d finally managed to cut a new trail through the old secondary forest, which connected our famous Ceiba pentandra Tree to Los Alvarados Charral. We have been talking about doing this for the last two years.

We already have a network of nice trails connecting all the pastures and upper woodlands to the hardwoods at Tigre Hill. We call this our easy trail, although you work up quite a sweat hiking it, because it doesn’t require hard climbing or agility. We also have trails going down into the old growth forest, including my favorite Waterfall hike. This spectacular hike takes about 5 hours to complete, but visitors rarely get that chance because we usually have to cut it short and bail out because of an injury.

What we needed was a shorter trail, which allowed visitors to experience old secondary growth forest without committing to more than 2-3 hours of hiking or risking mishaps. So after much machete work with the guys, Armando told me it was ready for me to hike.

But was it really ready? Armando’s idea of a trail is not something most humans would even recognize. One time, after getting lost on one of his ‘trails’, he realized that the guys would have to clean it up enough so that I could at least see where it went. Sometimes I think these guys navigate their way through that forest by scent! It’s amazing enough that he created a trail through jungle without using GPS. But he assured me that I could perfectly handle the new trail.

So off we went: me, Armando and Armando’s grandson, Little Armando – a cheerful 12 year old kid, with freckles, red hair and a wiry body equipped to climb all over the place like a monkey, just like his grandfather. Some of our dogs also came along, as usual. We started from the Charral and began hiking down into the forest. Armando designed the trail to take us past interesting trees and it zigzagged down the mountain. After the first heart-stopping, precipitous drop, I discovered that Armando had not cut the easy way down – it was certainly the most interesting way for botanists, but not easy. And yes, if they could manage it, visitors too would marvel at the magnificent Guayabon (Terminalia oblonga), Guanacaste (Enterolobium cyclocarpum), Nispero (Manilkara sp.), Mora (Maclura sp.), Ficus species, Brosimum colorado, Cedrela species, Guarea glabra, Guachipelin (Diphysa Americana), Cenizaro (Samanea saman), Yuco (Bernoullia flammea) and many others - plus some we could not yet identify.

In fact, Armando made a point of cutting the trail to reach not yet identified trees so we could take botanists there in the future for an ID. On several occasions, rather than follow the natural terrain along flat or gently sloping areas, he would swoop us down a steep incline in order not to miss, say, an unknown tree in the coffee family. Maybe a Genipa - but quien sabe? There are some genuine puzzles down there that we need help in figuring out. I just hope we can find dendrologists who are willing to give it a go.

We did see some interesting details related to natural succession. The fast growing trees, such as Guazuma and Achiotillo (Vismea baccifera), were already in decline as the slower growing hardwoods began shading them out. We saw a beautiful Chaperno (Lonchocarpus sp.), in full bloom, completely enclosed by a massive strangler fig. It only has a few more years yet of life but it still mesmerized us in its captivity with a canopy full of gorgeous violet flowers. Nature is cruel sometimes but, as Armando says, the dying all served their purpose in life.

When we got back, I was filthy from climbing and falling (neither Armando had a hair out of place of course) and Little Armando observed that perhaps they could cut stairs into the trail to facilitate future hikes. His grandfather gave me an alarmed look as if to say: “Say it ain’t so! Say you won’t turn a pristine forest into a tourist’s Disneyworld. What could I say? The only possible compromise. We would need to hike it several times to tamp it down enough to gain decent footing and perhaps the deer would lend us a hand by discovering it and using it as their highway.

But with inventory work yet to be done, I could never insist on the easy way.

Hotel TexMex

The rumours are true. We’ve moved out of the house in Ciudad Colon and into Hotel TexMex. Yep, that’s where we all can meet for Margaritas and Caldo Real. Come on over and join us for dinner sometime! It looks like we’ll be here for a while because the house out at Finca El Tigre won’t be ready until April- at last word. The first word was August of 2006 so we’re not sure yet if April really is the last word.

We do have an excellent architect and a very professional building team. Work is exceptional - very high quality throughout. Progress is slow.

We moved our housekeeper, Janet, over to her casita this week with all our brood of dogs and cats. She joins the Finca El Tigre workers and another brood of dogs and cats already living there. So Janet’s first order of business is to blend the two packs of animals. Kind of like an Animal Brady Brunch.

Hotel TexMex is going to be quite an adventure considering that El Jefe is used to staying at 5-star Hotels, usually upgraded to a suite, and often without paying anything at all, due to massive frequent flyer miles and platinum status and all the perks! His idea of roughing it is sitting out on the terrace at the Marriott.

So how did we end up at Hotel Tex Mex? Well it took some convincing because I was really quite shocked at the idea at first, and friends had made their homes available to prevent this sort of madness. But we are in transition from major life changes – Gerry leaving corporate life, and both of us changing to a lifestyle of residing and commuting between Finca El Tigre and New Orleans.

Hotel TexMex is our transition chapter - kind of like going from the sublime to the ridiculous. And, if we want to get right to the point, Gerry’s pal and personal physician, Dr. Bob, owns the place. Gerry hasn’t been for a medical checkup for over 10 years but if he has any sort of medical issue, he simply pops over to TexMex for dinner and a chat with Dr. Bob. Dr. Bob was once a Las Vegas Orthopedic Surgeon. He retired, moved to Paradise, got bored and opened up Tex Mex. We’ve been dining at his establishment every Sunday ever since. Now we live here.

We took two rooms opposite each other and installed ourselves, a small amount of luggage, our bed, towels, sheets, cleaning supplies…. Dr. Bob recently renovated the rooms so they’re actually quite comfortable, with good ventilation, excellent water pressure and tiled bathrooms. The main ingredients for survival.

The first night, we discovered some of those pesky tiny ants second-lining across our bathroom wall from the door frame to an outside window. No big shock – I’ve seen them at the Dentist’s too. At this point, we have taken the strategy of just ignoring them. It appears that they are just passing through. If they divert from that line, however and begin invading the room, we will terminate that strategy by terminating them!

Now that we’re over the initial shock of moving in here, we’ve settled into a rather pleasant routine. We can use the laundry facilities, make cappuccino in the morning and wander just down the block for the newspaper.

All these years, we always just eaten TexMex food or Chicken Soup – locally famous for hangovers and known as Caldo Real. But living here, we’ve had the opportunity to try other items on the menu and have been pleasantly surprised. Caesar salad with chicken -excellent! Fish dinner - very good, very fresh-tasting tilapia. And for all of you Buffalo Wing fanatics (yes, you members of the ‘Secret Wings Society’): the buffalo wings are crispy, moderately spicy and served properly with blue cheese salad dressing and plenty of celery. They provide extra hot salsa for those of us who like to kick it up a nice logarithmic notch.

So we have settled in and plan to stay here until at least a bedroom is ready for us to move into over at El Tigre.

Dr. Bob may have to expand that menu!

Bug Managment

Now In flower (among others):
Gallinazo (Schizolobium parahyba)
Chapero (Lonchocarpus- one species)
Uruca (Trichilia hirta)

It’s dry season. Most of the gorgeous butterflies have gone up into the trees or morphed, and the annual bug invasion has begun. It’s war out there – especially whenever the seasons change. Dry season is when the bees get ornery. As our Swiss entomologist neighbor, Paul, will tell us, there are many, many species of bees and wasps. Many flowers are only pollinated by one particular species of bee, so all are needed for the great balance in the forest.

But how do we deal with the stinging bees and bugs that invade a bit too close to home? Well, first of all, if you ask our trusty entomologist neighbor about the bugs, he will tell us that the word ‘bug’ in English, refers to just one family of insects, according to a Scottish author. We can’t recall which family or what author because we were too busy laughing. But he was serious! Guess we all get serious when people make fun of what we do!

Obviously, I’m no specialist of entomology. I basically treat insects according to my relationship with them. They are fascinating to look at in the forest. And we treat the really awesome, rarely seen beetles (like the one I saw the other day that looked just like a bright, yellow VW-Bug) with reverence and respect. And there is nothing more entertaining than waking up one more morning and finding a huge, colorful, science-fiction like insect clinging to the window screen out on the terrace. Now that is something awesome to behold and out comes the camera. We rarely see insects inside the house because we have screened, sealed and basically barricaded the place up to anything that flies, creeps or crawls. This is important for life in the tropical forest! We have scorpions, snakes, and creepy crawlies you couldn’t even imagine, all of which belong outside of the house!

We do tolerate one exception to a bug invasion inside the house. When the ‘visitors’ come, we allow them to swarm into the house to clean the whole place out. After just one hour or so, they swarm on out and leave the place spotlessly clean. Who are they? You will have to ask our neighbor, Paul, for the species name but they are a type of marauding ant. There are millions of them constantly on the move, and they eat everything in their path – scorpions/spiders/bugs- they take them all! It’s a bit shocking at first and most newcomers to the tropics try to stop the onslaught by spraying the perimeter of their house with insecticide. That is effective but it’s a disservice to the ‘visitors’ and to themselves.

You don’t need to fumigate your house in the tropics because the ‘visitors’ will periodically do it for you. We’ve been at our neighbor’s when the ‘visitors’ interrupted our cocktails out on the terrace. Now picture this: here we are in heels and cocktail dresses, when suddenly, Gabi says – “The visitors have come!” We look at the edge of the terrace and see that it’s turning black from the millions of invading ants. So what do we do? We simply move our cocktails over to another terrace. Now keep in mind that in small, bungalow houses, you actually have to leave the premises for an hour or so until the ants have finished cleaning.

As I write this, we are remodeling the house out at El Tigre. You can imagine our interview with the architect. He asks: “What are the important features you would like for your home - a state-of-the-art kitchen? An open, rustic décor?” Our answer: “We want you to build us a fortress against bugs. No bug hiding places! We want a bug unfriendly house.”

The details of how our architect dealt with this will be left for another day- and no, he didn’t build us a moat. The house isn’t done yet, so we don’t know if it will actually be bug unfriendly, or, more to the topic, if the ‘visitors’ will even need to go in and clean out the house now and then. My best guess is probably, but hopefully not too often.

So that’s how we are attempting to deal with bugs in the home. We deal with the bugs out in the gardens and the stables very differently. It’s absurd to screen up the horse stables so we need a different tact. Basically, we require continuous vigilance to keep the creepy crawlies at bay. The barn cats kill snakes and just about anything else that moves. During the day, the chickens scratch their way through the horse stalls and out into the gardens, eating larvae. Everything else of nuisance we annihilate with a squirt bottle full of soapy water. Any kind of soap will do. We use cheap laundry detergent.

Got wasps building a nest on the stable eave? Spray them with soap. The wet ones fall and die and the others fly away.

Got little worms eating the passion flower leaves? Spray them with soap. They drop off and die.

We ignore most wasps and bees outside because they are just going about their business and not being a nuisance. We only use the soapy water if they move in too close and start, say, stinging our animals. Then we have to take them out.

Some bees do not like dry, windy weather. If a nest gets too aggressive and they start stinging our animals, we attach a kerosene lighted rag at the end of a huge bamboo pole and burn the nest after dark, when they’re all in there. This requires considerable skill so I wouldn’t recommend that you try this at home. We don’t want to burn down the tree with the bees!

We do have to concoct something special for horse biting flies – but that’s only a problem during a few months in the rainy season. Speaking of that, anybody know where I can get a cheap still in Costa Rica? Somebody who makes Guaro, maybe? I need to distill some citronella. Honest.